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Dad, why did my friend die?
Written by: Jawad Harb
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Jan. 29 2009 Saturday was the first day of school for my children. My 12-year-old son Yazan is in the 6th grade. He went to school and realized he lost six schoolmates. One of the boys used to sit in the desk behind Yazan, so every time he turns and looks behind him, the boy he used to talk to, to laugh with, is not there anymore. The children lived through the air strikes, the danger, the lack of sleep, and now they have a world that they don't recognize. They can't understand why their classmates are dead. Yazan asks me, "Why did my friend die? Why was his house hit? What did he do wrong?" They want to know why children were killed. They know that many adults were killed, but for them, it is more difficult to understand when it is children, children like them, who were hurt, or killed, or were in pain. For Ziad, who is six, his school was destroyed in a bombing two weeks ago. They haven't found any place for the kids yet, so they sit in tents surrounded by rubble. I sent Ziad to the tent school for two days, but I didn't like it. It's outside, so it's very cold, and it's in the middle of broken glass and brick and debris. I don't know what's in the rubble - we have heard that there could be remains of weapons like white phosphorous or depleted uranium, or unexploded bombs. It is not safe. So now, Ziad will stay home. He will miss his first year of school. He just started going to school in September. He used to be so excited about going to school, but when I told him he would stay home from now on, he didn't say anything. Some of his friends have gone back to the tent school, but their parents are starting to think twice, too. There are no temporary spaces for schools, but they will not allow construction material into Gaza. So many houses and schools are destroyed. The houses that remain standing are holding several families. It is a mess in Gaza, until we can start to rebuild. But how can we rebuild, without cement, or glass, or wood? I can't tell you how agonizing these stories are that the kids are talking about. They keep talking about it - the war, what they saw on TV, their friends who died. They imagine how they died. Counsellors at the schools are doing activities for the children to talk to their sadness out. I hope these things work. It's a big trauma for the children. They are so young. My daughters, who are older, don't open up to me. Maybe they talk to their mother. All my life I thought girls like to talk, but now I realize that sometimes it is hard to get girls to talk. They look so sad, but they only answer yes or no to my questions. They are still shocked. They smile less than usual. One of my daughters is trying to write poems. She is talking about her experience in Gaza during the war, and how we Palestinians felt abandoned by the world. She wrote, "We were crying out for peace, we were crying out for help, but no one listened to us." She is 15 years old. I am working again. It used to take me 30 minutes to get to work; now it takes one hour. The asphalt is destroyed. We drive slowly. There are holes everywhere. At first, I was still shocked, especially seeing Gaza City for the first time, and the level of destruction - the houses, the schools, the buildings. At first, I couldn't work. I was sitting with my colleagues, asking about people, trying to find out who had died, because we couldn't find out during the war. The one thing we all missed during the conflict was sleeping at night. At least now we are able to sleep peacefully again, and we all hope this will continue. But there are many things ahead of us. CARE will continue to distribute food, and emergency supplies, and medicine. Gaza will need to rebuild. And children, like my children, will need help recovering from this trauma.
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8 responses to “Dad, why did my friend die?”
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30 Jan 2009 15:16:03 GMT
Do not feel abbandoned, we are with you. I wish I can swap place with your children. May Allah, protect you all palestinian.
30 Jan 2009 15:17:52 GMT
Many children who are born to live and brought up in conflicts areas are naturally like yours kids Jawad Harb. I had my own experience in one of the longest ethnic conflicts in another part of Asia in Srilanka bring up my own kids. But you and I are very lucky able to save our own kids life from these conflicts. Just remember hundreds of children getting killed daily in Gaza and in Northern Srilanka. Denied from schools for their education and medical help for their inflicted wounds. Even today I read from a UN agencies report out of three hundred injured transported from war zones there are fifty seriously injured children. How many such wounded children have already been killed in Gaza and in Northern Srilanka ?. When you and I are deeply worried about these atrocities in different parts of the world today. I just read an impressive news also about a kid Maya Arulpragasam who was born in Srilankan conflict area being nominated fo! r an international musical award.
30 Jan 2009 16:39:24 GMT
I'm amazed that CARE allow this propaganda to be released in their name. "Dad, why did my friend die"? "Because our terrorist government bombed Israel"
02 Feb 2009 02:56:51 GMT
Mr. Harb, please know that I am one of the "we" who has not abandoned you nor the ongoing plight of the Palestinian people. Thank you for your testimony and am grateful that your voice has not been censored or silenced. "We" are listening.
I am equally appalled at the present wanton carnage of Gazans and amazed at the endurance and forbearance of the Palestinian people in general over the previous 40 years of encroachment and harsh oppression. To Pierre: mainstream media narrows minds and hearts. To get up to speed http://www.alternatefocus.org for documentary videos. The video, Off the Chart, is a good beginning.02 Feb 2009 03:00:08 GMT
The author is right, the rubble is not safe now, but there is no depleted uranium in the rubble - the claim that DU was used by Israel is totally false - if you do not believe me, then go the UN Environment Programme Post Conflict Branch report on similar false claims made in Lebanon in 2006. The 2007 UNEP report discusses the extensive testing of 32 suspect site and not one of them contained any form of "processed uranium" - one had a higher than normal level of "natural uranium", that which is found every where on earth and is due to the natural weathering of rocks and the creation of sands and soils. The report is at http://postconflict.unep.ch/publications.php?prog=lebanon -- other factual scientific reports about DU are linked to Message 88 from DUStory that is given as the link in my name.
15 Feb 2009 17:48:17 GMT
Beautiful article. It's heartbreaking. Yes, the world it's so disgustingly inert in front of Palestinian sufferings just because of the Israeli lobbies job. Though there are lots of people who are caring for you. This massacre is finally opening the eyes of the world on what Israel really is.
18 Feb 2009 16:07:50 GMT
This massacre is finally opening the eyes of the world on what the terrorist government that the so called Palestinians voted in.
The world has seen yet again that Hamas, Fatah, Islamic Jihad etc do not care about the Gazans, as they are still firing rockets into Israel and hiding behind children. If Hamas cares so much about the people they say they care about why then was Hamas caught stealing U.N. aid yet again?19 Feb 2009 12:03:34 GMT
What is wrong with this country? ANY idiot can see how much money would be saved if this country would stop policing the world. The people do not live in fear why do you. What happens there is not our concern, your consern is protecting our constitution and our people nothing more. THAT is what you are to be paid for, not making war. War will not make peace. Stop robbing the people of this country.