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Dad, when are we going to die?
Written by: Jawad Harb
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My child just started crying - she just heard on the news that Israel will start bombing our neighbourhood, because there are allegedly insurgents living here. She has been having nightmares that our house will be totally destroyed, and our family will die under it. She has seen the photos of other destroyed homes on TV. She said to me, "Dad, if they bomb us, where are we going to go? What do we do? All the houses are targeted. We can't even run." I didn't have an answer. My brain is totally paralyzed. I have a masters degree in psychology, but I have no idea how to counsel my own family. For 10 days, the bombs have been falling. The nearest one destroyed a home 300 metres from where we live. My 12-year-old son is becoming an expert at pinpointing the distance of the bombs: "That one was 500 metres away, to the north," he says to me. He is always right. But this is not the kind of expertise I want my child to have. I can't really describe what my children are feeling. They burst out crying when it is dark and cold, at night when we listen to the bombs like thunder. We live in Rafah, about 500 metres from the border with Egypt. There are tunnels to Egypt nearby, which people use to smuggle food and supplies. So the bombing has been heavy here. Israel is trying to destroy the tunnels. We don't have any bread. No fruit, no vegetables, no milk. The last time I ate meat was nine days ago, bought in the market. The market is closed now. There is no more food coming through the tunnels. We have just rice and macaroni for the children. We have no stocks. No biscuits for my children, like they used to eat. We survive, just. This is the third day without electricity. We used to get electricity for three hours a day, but that stopped when the Israeli ground troops came in. My wife has to go out with the other women to find firewood because we have no electricity to cook. We have a three day supply of cooking fuel, but we are saving it for an emergency. The water is almost gone. We hope we will get more tomorrow. Without electricity, the water pump doesn't work. I have a generator that we use a couple of hours a day, to watch the news, charge our mobile phones, and try to work. But the generator is not strong enough to run the water pump. I bought 10 days' worth of fuel, and it is almost gone. We ran out of drinking water last night, so my nephew and I went out to the desalination station one kilometre away. We know there are bombs falling, but we can't live without water. We had to carry the 20-litre containers on our shoulders, because there is no transport. On our way home, a bomb fell nearby and we dropped the containers to take shelter - but we couldn't leave the water behind. But it is hard to run with a 20-litre container. We fear everything. Every day, every sound. The children in my neighbourhood - and my kids - are not hoping to live. They don't think they will live. Instead, they are waiting to die, waiting for the bomb to fall. And they are asking me when it will happen.
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7 responses to “Dad, when are we going to die?”
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09 Jan 2009 13:40:19 GMT
Jawad, may Allah be with you and your family and protect you in such horribly difficult times.My family and I are all praying for you.
09 Jan 2009 13:40:36 GMT
Mr.Harb,
Tell your children they are NOT going to die. Don't feed their hopelessness. Feed their tummies with the rice and macaroni and make up little stories using the rice and macaroni. Have the rice and macaroni 'talking' to your children, telling them that the rice loves them, then the macaroni says they love them more. You are feeling traumatized, it is hindering you momentarily from counselling your children. Of course you can.10 Jan 2009 12:24:58 GMT
Dear Jawad, allow me to say dear Jawad cz we are all bothers. Please Please assure your kids that they will not die, keep calming them and holding them tight to him to feel safe cz there is nothing is as safe as the parents lap and may allah keep them safe and all the people in Gaza. Please tell them to stay next to you and hold them tight and I hope to always hear from you and hear that you are safe.
10 Jan 2009 12:41:43 GMT
What is happening to you is disgusting. It is outrageous. They should put the politicians up against the wall. I am a tv news journalist. I am watching everything that is going on from the comfort of a newsroom in France. There is nothing I can do except report the mealy-mouthed words of the Israelis and the outrageous antics of the americans. but we are thinking of you all. all the time. and praying someone will come to their senses. Good luck. Stay safe.
11 Jan 2009 17:22:11 GMT
When are we going to die? it is the same question being asked in every part of the world where many conflicts are taking place today. Killing forces from your neighbouring fields wanted you to get out of Gaza if you want to save your kids and family. With your educational back ground of a master degree Jawad you love your land of birth and because of fear of death you don't want to run away from the imposed prison life of Gaza. Because of this imposed prison life and occupation of your land some fighters are firing rockets at the killer's supporting population. In retaliation of one killed in theirs side they want to kill hundreds of your kids sick and elderly by massive air attacks. Civilized world is watching this brutality now for many days instead of imposing an amicable political solution to this long conflict. Most of the fate of world conflicts today are the same. I have suffered a similar situation in Srilanka several years ago but like a coward I emigrated to western world. Brave people in our soil are still fighting for a multiracial democratic rule in our land. So called International society is quietly enjoying these killings as it is happening in your neighbouring helping the killers with all modern sophisticated weapons. Defending forces of the helpless civilians are banned internationally and branded as deadly Terrorist by the International societies. My prayers and greeting to you and all your neighbors, Let the powerful all mighty god save you and your family from this carnage.
11 Jan 2009 17:24:50 GMT
All I have to say is, Dear Jawad Allah is seeing everything, If something is going to happen under the grace of God it will happen nobody will stop, and If something is not going to happen, nobody can do that....
19 Jan 2009 02:55:39 GMT
Assalamualaykum Jawad,
I feel very sorry about whats going on. May Allah, The Almighty gives all the peoples peace, protection from all the evils of this earth. I know I can't understand the circumstances you are going through. I feel myself very sorry about all the peoples there. May Allah, The Almighty gives you patience and peace to you and your family.