(updates with Islamist comment, paragraph 13)

By Marie-Louise Gumuchian

KHARTOUM, Oct 31 (Reuters) - Diplomats trying to salvage talks between Somali government and Islamist delegations on Tuesday struggled to persuade both sides to agree on who should chair negotiations to avert war in the Horn of Africa.

Both parties are in the Sudanese capital Khartoum but have yet to meet face-to-face, mainly due to Islamist objections over the presence of Ethiopian troops in Somalia and to Kenya co-chairing the discussions with the Arab League.

"There are so many proposals but it is very hard to get two sides so far apart to compromise," one observer at the talks told Reuters.

Tuesday's efforts to bring the parties closer saw a posse of diplomats including African, Arab and U.N. officials repeatedly conferring among themselves before briefing the delegations separately at their rooms on different floors of a luxury Khartoum hotel. In Somalia itself, government and Islamist troops were facing off on Tuesday near the administration's sole outpost Baidoa, and in another blow to President Abdullahi Yusuf, some of his relatives joined the Islamists in a northern town. The powerful religious movement has said there will be no talks at all in Khartoum unless Ethiopian troops they say have invaded Somalia to prop up the government are withdrawn.

The Islamists also objected to Kenya chairing the talks, arguing that Nairobi was biased because it already backed a plan to deploy east African peacekeepers in the chaotic country.

Kenya also chairs the regional Inter-Governmental Authority on Development (IGAD), which shepherded Somalia's peace process two years ago. Kenya's ambassador to Somalia, Mohamed Affey, said IGAD was ready to withdraw if that would help talks start.

"IGAD will never be and has never been an impediment to the process," Affey told reporters.

"IF IT FAILS, THAT'S IT"

Diplomats also discussed asking Sudan to chair the talks.

"The idea is that Sudan, as an Arab League and IGAD member, sits on the podium and hosts (this round of) talks," one Western diplomat said. "Our role is to get the two sides talking. The process is more important because if it fails, that's it."

An Islamist spokesman said his side agreed to Sudan chairing the talks but that their other concerns remained.

And one diplomat said the government team had rejected the idea of Sudan chairing the talks, and wanted Kenya to remain.

While the Islamists say Kenya is biased, the interim government for its part accuses the Arab League of bias.

The rise of the Islamists, who control much of southern Somalia after seizing the capital Mogadishu in June, has isolated the provincially based administration and hampered its efforts to impose central rule on a country in chaos since 1991.

Fearing the standoff could spark a regional war sucking in Ethiopia and Eritrea -- accused of backing the government and Islamists respectively -- analysts say a truce is the priority.

One Islamist commander on southern Somali's frontline told Reuters that after seizing Baidoa, they planned to unite the whole country, including the self-declared states of Puntland and Somaliland, under sharia (Islamic law).

"We will not retreat, come what may," he said.

Residents said some of Yusuf's cousins joined the Islamists in Galkaayo, a relatively peaceful Puntland town.

"The men are from Yusuf's sub-sub clan," one resident told Reuters. "They are crazy people who want to bring chaos here." (Additional reporting by Guled Mohamed in Somalia)

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